Some protestors have taken advantage of the publicity generated by the recent Hiroshima and Nagasaki anniversaries to call for a worldwide ban on nuclear weapons. Personally, I'm all in favor of such a ban.

What? You're surprised?

Well, you shouldn't be. It's kind of like that old bumpersticker: "If nuclear weapons are outlawed, only outlaws will have nuclear weapons." And needless to say, I would be one of the outlaws! That's the type of thing that would help our bargaining position when negotiating for donations of food.

Let's see Bush try to push me around once I'm the world's sole remaining superpower!