I have been following with great interest the events in the California dictator's recall. Quite frankly, I am puzzled. Why doesn't Gray Davis just ship those questioning his rule off to forced labor camps? For the life of me, I will never understand this Democracy crap. Wasn't he already elected for four years? So what if the people are changing their minds!! They should be forced to either live with their decision, or made to serve as targets during military training exercises. I'll bet theyll drop those petitions the moment the first artillery shell explodes three feet away.
At any rate, I have decided to give Democracy a chance. That's why I am hereby announcing my candidacy for governor of California. And before anyone decides to object too loudly, keep in mind that I have missiles that can already reach Los Angeles and San Francisco.
Don't act so surprised. Your President already knows this, but he was too afraid to challenge my far superior military might. That's why he decided to take on that wimp Saddam instead.